Say Your Goodbyes While You Still Can

I've done it.  The first big surgery is scheduled for Thursday.  Last May an x-ray revealed a developing problem.  My post diving board accident teeth are in trouble.  I put it off and put it off, then finally knowing it couldn't wait years, I went to the specialist in October to get an assessment and guesstimate on cost.  Turns out the root holding in my fake tooth is disolving away.  The October x-ray showed that a third tooth had died as well.  The scope of my fix-it plan just kept growing as does the stomach churning size of the bill.

 

About one hour after my consultation visit back at the very beginning of October we submitted the costs to the insurance company to see what our portion would be.  Now we are six months later and six or seven statements have arrived, all stating basically "We don't know anything.  We make no promises about your cost.  We need more time to think about it. We'll let you know sometime before the year 2059."  The December x-rays show that the resorbtion is continuing to progress and tooth #9 is hanging by less and less of a thread.

 

Last week we decided to just move ahead with the process regardless of the insurance disaster.  I had the impressions made for my flipper last Friday. Brian will pick up my tooth retainer Wednesday afternoon.  Sigh.  This Thursday at 1:30 they will start the drilling to remove the old tooth and root.  One bone graft.  One gum graft. Pain meds and a hole in my killer smile.  Just wanted you to know, there are only a few days left to say goodbye to the tooth.

 

This whole process is more emotionally taxing than I thought it would be.  I can talk a good game, but it's got me a bit frazzled and feeling broken and insecure inside.  I will probably talk differently.  I will feel sore and cranky. And frankly, who really has the self confidence to do this without a major blow to the self esteem?  My stomach gets all tight and sick thinking of the upcoming week.  This whole thing just sucks.  And will continue to suck for the next 12 months and 3 surgeries.  Yippee.  If I don't smile at you for six months, at least now you know why.