I admit, we lead a pretty caucasian life. Even though we have friends of several nationalities in our neighborhood court, more than half of the people are caucasian, just like us. It's one of the reasons that I thought I would like to raise my kids outside of the super white state of Utah. It isn't anyone's fault, but Utah is very caucasian and I wanted my kids to see a diverse group of people living together. Texas was a pretty good mix of racial groups. Virginia is a reasonable mix too, but I often forget to notice.
On the first day of school, after Ben got off the bus, I asked him if he made any friends that day. His response was, "Mom, you can't really make a friend in just one day. It takes more time than that. I didn't talk to anyone today. I was just watching people today 'cause I was shy to talk to them."
No surprise that Ben has been hesitant to talk to anyone at school, but after three days I figured he would be warming up to his classmates and becoming comfortable enough to have made a friend or two. So I probed again today to see if he's talking to the other kids yet. I put Maddie and Jacob down for a nap and told Ben to wash his hands and we'd have a special reward snack. We broke out the spoons, peanut butter, chocolate chips and M&Ms and ate while we talked.
Mom: "Are you talking to the kids at snack time yet?"
Ben: "Well...kind of."
Mom trying to get him to open up: "Do you laugh about silly and funny things with Jacob?" (the only name I can remember was written on his table at open house day)
Ben breaking out in a sly smile: "Yeah."
Mom: "Does everyone say silly things at snack time?"
Ben in a full happy smile now: "Yeah, I like to laugh with the two kids on this side of me." (pointing to his right side)
Mom: "Is one of those guys the kid named Jacob?"
Ben: "Yeah. The guy that is two guys away from me."
Mom: "Who sits between you and Jacob?"
Ben: "A girl. I don't know her name."
Mom: "Who else sits at your table?"
Ben: "I don't know their names. There is the one guy that isn't the brown guy. Like...he has skin like a match to you and me."
Mom (snickering and not sure how to interpret that comment): "So do you like everyone at your table?"
Ben: "No. Not really."
Mom: "Who do you not like yet?"
Ben: "The girl that is across from me."
Mom: "Why don't you like her?"
Ben with a furrowed brow and frusteration in his voice: "She's always just staring at me the whole time I'm sitting at my table and she is at the table."
Mom: "Doesn't she look at the other kids too?"
Ben: "No. She only looks at me and I don't like it cause that's all she does to me. She doesn't even talk to me."
More conversing about how we could try to be nice and talk to her....
Ben: "I just have one best friend."
Mom: "Who is that?"
Ben: "The person that I can't explain their name."
Mom: "Tell me the things you know about your best friend."
Ben: "She is the girl I sit with on the bus. That's all I know."
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1 comment:
Cute.
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