License to Sing

I'm not a fan of potty talk. We don't discuss bathroom events at the dinner table. Sponge Bob viewing isn't allowed on our television. Jacob knows the rules and is pretty good at following them. He used to ask everytime he was sitting on the toilet doing his business, "Can I say" this word and that one to which I would have to answer, "Yes. You can say it while we are in the bathroom."

Lately he is a bit more independent in his bathroom abilities and just calls me it to wipe so he has a little time alone. I've been hearing him sing a new song as he sits on the pot. It's a random and happy tune with notes all over the place. The lyrics vary in order but repeat the same ten or so singular words over and over and over. It goes something like this, "Poo poo" "pee" and all the proper words of the important boy parts of both genders. He sings and sings and sings his happy little song - within the bathroom walls. When he leaves the free speech zone I don't hear another peep of him and the potty words. He's totally enjoying his license to sing.

Simple Arithmetic

Just look at the size of that drink and the size of Jakes tummy. We had to use the toilet three times during the ninety minute movie today. After the first trip I realized I had a problem on my hands. I thought to myself that if I just hurried up and drank most of it we wouldn't hit his high level alarm again. But he loves "daddy drink" as we call soda in our house. The second trip to the bathroom I remembered that I'm pregnant and my bladder space, like Jake, is limited at the moment. My racing him to drink all the soda had consequences.
When we got back to Ben and Maddie in the theatre I tried hiding the drink from Jacob. He searched. So I swapped his for an empty cup. He popped the lid off and ate ice for a few minutes before he wiggled down off his seat and went to trade Maddie for her drink, which was nearly full. All told he had a super successful potty training day!

Sharing Taken to the Extreme

Do you ever grab the camera and download the pictures then look through them later? Sometimes I find surprises that make me laugh right out loud. Apparently Brian caught this one on film while I wasn’t around. This takes the concept of sharing to a whole new level. I’m thinking future wedding video shots here.

More On Lizard Poop

I'm halfway trying to potty train Jacob. Mostly when he says he's interested or when life is slow and I happen to remember to put him on the toilet. Turns out someone else is potty training too. The last two mornings I have had to scrub the downstairs floor when I woke up because there was a bunch of lizard poop around the toilet. This morning I lifted the lid to use it myself and I found lizard poop on the sit down portion of the toilet seat. Gross. At least someone is paying attention to the potty training lessons. Maybe next time the lizards will actually get it into the bowl. We continue to have too many lizards around here. I've been to three stores and haven't found lizard traps yet. I often have to clean their poop and pee off the walls and if I don't catch it soon enough it leaves the walls just the slightest bit discolored. Three years of this and the walls are going to look atrocious. Brian couldn't sleep the other night so he went to the couch downstairs. In the morning he mentioned that he heard something like continuous clapping going on all night long and couldn't figure out what it was. I'm 99% sure it's the lizards making their chirp type noises. They have even knocked something off the counter once. Pesky tails I guess. Our cleaning lady, Mary, mentioned that I still need to get the traps so I proudly reported that though I couldn't find the traps yet I had squished some and killed them. She recoiled with surprise and concern. Sure, squishing a lizard is gross, but why should she be worried? She said that if the lizard gets scared it will drop its tail off and it will keep wiggling across the floor. Still not sure that it is a problem I asked what the problem was. I had a hard time not laughing at her very serious response. If the tail is still alive and wiggling across the floor and my kids are laying on the floor watching TV the tail might get in their ears. Right......Okay.....I'll watch out for loose lizard tails jumping into my kids ears. Maybe I misunderstood what she was telling me. That is totally possible, but I'm not overly concerned about it and here is why. This is how I picture the scene going down. Mom sees a lizard and knows she has to kill it. She finds a shoe heavy enough to inflict a proper blow. She swings, making a huge splat noise. The lizard isn't totally dead and starts running or hopefully limping away. Mom lets out a classic high pitched girly girl scream and is jumping around on the floor trying to stay away from the injured lizard (and apparently his detached tail) while still keeping an eye on it and planning my next attack strike. You tell me the kids aren't gonna be right in the middle of that action. They'll either be scared and running for their dear lives or helping me get the darn thing with their own shoes. Sure as the nose on my face they won't be laying down watching TV pretending like nothing is going on in the room. Maybe Mary meant that the tails can wiggle for four hours or so and they could get in their ears later in the day? That makes more sense. I have so much left to learn about living in Singapore.

Heard Around the House

Mom at the table helping Jacob eat his lunch in the high chair. Maddie calls out from the bathroom, "Mom! I got a poo-poo!" Ben working on legos at the party table (that's what we call the dining room table) hollers a loud, "YES! Now we all get Hershey Kisses because Maddie pooped! Can you get them now mom?" Jacob, "Ahhh!!" (translated to say "I want pears, not chicken nuggets!") Mom enters the bathroom and Maddie is standing naked pointing at the toilet, "I got two. Aren't they pretty good ones?" What an exciting life I lead.

Working in the kitchen cleaning up some random unnecessary mess on the table, I commented, "This is just so irritating." Ben's eyes about popped out of his head. "You mean an ear is going to grow out of it?" "What are you talking about?" "You said and ear was growing out of it." "Huh?" "Well, you said it was ear-itating."

Princesses Don't Potty

The report from sweet Princess Maddie this morning was that princesses don't potty. This is what she told me after she came back from tinkling in the kiddie toilet. Her reasoning is that they never show the princesses go to the bathroom in the movies so it must never happen. What am I supposed to say to that? On a positive note she has pooped in the toilet for about two weeks today. Not 100%. More like 90%. LOTS better than 0%. Mommy is happier and more calm. Maddie is really proud of herself. Things are getting better around here. I can't pin my finger on the trigger for the change. We offered the child everything under the moon. Now I have to follow through on all those promises everytime she makes a deposit. It started out fun but soon grew old even to her*. Now we have to do so much I'm grateful she is already transitioning to wanting just the sticker and a Hershey Kiss. Grandma promised a walk to the lake by our house. I know that helped, but I'm still baffled what was the magic trigger. She just sort of started doing it one day. Whatever it was she's proud of herself and happy. So is mom. Life is getting better here. I'm hoping that her morning proclamation doesn't amount to anything because I have to believe that princesses really do potty. They just cut that part out of the movie during the cartoon editing process. *Promises Made: parade around kitchen with loud music paint fingernails wear dancing leotard snack size candy bar Hershey Kisses sticker chart to earn Chuck E. Cheese watch brand new princess tea party movie probably more that I can't remember right now

Maddie Says

One day last week Maddie and I were talking and I was encouraging her to poop in the toilet and not her diaper. I reminded her about one time when she did it and all the fun things we did for her. We cranked the music really loud and had a marching parade all around the kitchen and living room, painted her fingernails and toenails, gave her candy, sticker on her sticker chart to earn a new movie, wear her favorite dance leotard and more. She smiled politely as I listed all the amazing cool things we get to do in my most exciting and animated voice with energetic hand motions and facial expressions. When I ask what she thinks and if she will try the potty now her comment was in a tone of complete dismissal, "Yeah, but that's just a fiction story, right Mom?" Just try not laughing until you cry when you are at your wits end trying to potty train your three year old and they tell you that the whole idea of them using the toilet is a fiction story. What am I supposed to do now? Ben learned the difference between fiction and non-fiction a month ago in school at the library. He has been pretty consistent about using those words about things in all facets of his life when describing real or imaginary things since then. Obviously Maddie has picked up on it too.

Maddie On Potty Training

Maddie has been a huge helper and really excited about everything preschool. This morning when I was prepping things before the kids arrived she got it in her head to help me set up. I gave her some little task and after she completed it for me she returned to report she had put out all the sitting mats. I thanked her. She smiled and replied, "I will always listen and obey everything, everything you ever say." She smiled and started to walk away and quickly turned back and motioned with both her hands in front of her as if to say stop. She continued, "Except for pooping in the potty. I won't ever do that one. Okay, mommy. I won't do what you say to poop in the potty 'cause I don't like that one. I can do all the other things you say mommy and obey." Just in case I had missed that sentiment in our daily arm wrestle over the bathroom, she has now made herself perfectly clear. At least we know where she stands, right?

Play Interrupted

After my last post about Maddie's potty success, ten short hours later she pooped in her pants. I wasn't the least bit surprised. Oh well. It's a process, right? She has had lots of success when I initiate and remind. She just isn't independent yet. I have been trying to reconcile my policy for the clean up for accidents. Months ago I did the mean and nasty cold bath as a natural consequence. Now I've been kind and gently doing a clean it up yourself system. If she messes, we nicely clean it up together. She has to do most of it and she isn't much of a fan of getting poop all over her hands in the washing process. The worst thing for her is washing her underwear. So far I have kept my cool and she's been willing to comply with the requirements. We'll see if we can both be good or if I snap. I hope and pray I can be good and keep the potty training progressing with positive reinforcement and praise rather than shame and tears. Lets face it, positive is so much better than being mean. Today, though, twice, she stopped play on her own and went to the potty and announced to me that she was going to "get some pee pees." Yes!! Folks, that's a sign. She's ready. By the way, she got another candy bar today if you know what I mean! Life is good. Maybe it will be fast this time and I won't have to potty train her three times like I did with Ben.

One of These Color and One of Those

This is a picture of Maddie enjoying a mini candy bar with her breakfast. I couldn't be more proud. You see, she gets a candy bar every time she poops in the potty. We have been doddling with potty training since last August. That is one solid year now. Guess how many candy bars she has earned in a year. One. Until today. I got all the kiddos set up with breakfast both at the table and in the high chair. Then I took the recycling out to the curb and rummaged through someone else's trash to grab out the coupon packets from the Sunday paper. Upon my return I was greeted with Ben hollering out of the bathroom that Maddie needed a wipe. Sure. She pees all the time. I entered the bathroom to see them sitting side by side. Ben on the big toilet, Maddie on her potty chair. She got up a little in order to show me, "Look. I got one of these color and one of those color." (poop and pee) I was elated. Success! "Great job!!!" I beamed. "Now I get my candy bar, wright, mommy?" "ABSOLUTELY!!!"

OFFICIAL NOTICE

Nice mommy is gone. Mean mommy is here. Nice mommy will return after swim season ends, potty training is successful and Jacob starts to eat faster from a spoon. Please adjust your expectations accordingly. Thank you. The Management

TMI

My friend Lori was over today visiting with me. Ben was in the living room with us and left to use the bathroom. After he washed his hands he headed up the stairs and called down to me that he had to change. When he returned to the living room with us, he made a point to go tell Lori, "I had to go change my pants AND my underwear because they got wet when I was using the bathroom." Thank you Ben. TMI for a friendly visit though. WAY too much information.

Not Now

About two weeks ago I decided I'd had enough of the stinky diapers from Maddie. She knew what she was doing and was deciding not to use the toilet. We started some tough love potty training with the natural consequence of a cold bath (rinsing her bum) when she pooped in her diaper. After six days we hadn't had a single success. Saturday night I was thinking as I lay in bed after Brian had drifted off to sleep about the situation. The impression came with power then that I needed to stop my plan. Now was not the right time and cold baths were not the right approach for this child in this moment. I was struck with the urgency of the feelings. I couldn't shake the feeling and after a while I pulled myself out of bed and began to pray about what to do. While I think my method is an acceptable way to handle the problem, I know that it is not right for this child at this time. I will always wonder what the reason was. Is it because she physically isn't ready (her muscles can't do it yet), is it the wrong time for me to handle it as an adult (let's face it, potty training is rough on parents and their patience level), was she feeling demeaned and humiliated because of the way I was handling the situation (that could have significant consequences beyond potty training) or something else? So I quit. No more cold baths. Not now. No more words about it. Ever. She has regressed back to peeing in her diaper too and almost never using the potty. I've let it go for now. I know it is the right thing for Maddie. Today though, I'm thinking about my experience. God knows my children better than I ever will. He can see their tender, sweet hearts and can guide me to teach and nurture them in the best way for each child as an individual. I think what I learned two things: 1. Listen to the promptings I am given, God will show me the best things in the right moments. Then obey his direction even when you don't know why. 2. If I fail to pray and study the scriptures every day, it extends beyond myself. I am doing a huge disservice to my children. They need me to be in tune with the direction God is sending to me for them. It is so much bigger than me. My kids need me to be connected to God.

Potty Success

It is not my idea of good timing to potty train 14 days before the arrival of a new baby. Maddie however, has different ideas. She has been telling me for days when she has to potty and going in the bathroom and sitting, fully clothed, on her potty to make her stinkies in the diaper. Finally, today she demanded that I come take her diaper off. I obliged and she had a success. We made a big deal, she got a chocolate chip and was elated. What do I do now? Crash course and then let her regress after the baby comes or ignore her requests. Bad timing.

Not to be outdone...

Maddie peed on the floor two more times before the end of the night. Ben freaked out and had to take a bath because some of the pee got on his leg and foot. At least that part made me laugh, even if mopping the floor two more times didn't...

Potty Training

Maddie decided she wanted to use the potty two weeks ago. She does okay. I guess I should take her interest and regular successes as the sign to buckle down and do it before she looses interest, but I'm not sure I have the patience anymore right now. Today Maddie wanted to potty. We went in, stripped naked and then proceeded to get the her baby doll totally ready to potty too. Finally, the baby doll went first and was nicely sitting down waiting when Maddie, calmly watching baby try to potty, pees all over the floor. Ugh. After we got home from morning errands I mention we could try again and she decides okay. We strip her naked, because you know you can't potty with a single stitch of clothes on, it doesn't work that way. She sits for a while and gets bored. I have to run and help Ben in the kitchen. She leaves the bathroom and is leaning on the far side of the neighbors car seat in the entryway when I return, naked and smiling. I tell her she must wear a diaper if she isn't sitting on the potty. She tries to be cute and is giggling for a minute or so, hiding behind the car seat. Finally, I decide to get serious and put the diaper on. As I move around the car seat, I see she's pooped all over the ground. Double ugh. I take her in the bathroom to wipe off her legs and I stand her up on the stool. She says, "Potty." I say, "Yes, we poo poo in the potty." I reach to grab some toilet paper to clean her up and sure enough, she had to potty. She peed all over the stool and the bathroom floor. Triple ugh for the day. Anyone want to earn some extra money moping floors for a week or two? J-you need cash, right?