Chair Theft Update - Crisis Averted

Upon Brian's return home Thursday evening I was, well, loosing it. People just don't believe me about Jacob. He is so pleasant when we're out. He's not pleasant at home. He screams. All day long. This particular day Jacob had been screaming from almost the instant he woke in the morning until 5pm when we all heard the familiar sounds of Daddy's key in the front door. Poor man. He didn't know what he was walking into. Honestly we only heard the key because I was out of scream at the moment. Jacob had shredded every last nerve in my frail psyche. Ben and Maddie had made a massive mess of cut up paper scraps, markers, crayons and staples all over the kitchen table and floor and were NOT interested in cleaning it up. Jacob was buckled into his high chair with a snack and screaming at the top of his lungs. I'd had it. I was yelling and angry, "Clean that UP!!" "Stop Jacob!" and the like. For anyone under the false pretense that motherhood is all glamor, you are invited over to my place for a reality check. Some days just suck. No. Some days really, really really SUCK rocks. But there are no smoke breaks for a mother at home (see my post Aug 3, 2009). We all heard the key in the lock and since no one ran to greet him, he tried to bait them with a friendly, "Fee fie fo fum..." I met him at the door and confessed in tears that it would really be best if I left now. The kids hadn't done anything wrong but I had and I needed to leave now. I NEEDED to leave NOW. He is a saint. How I scored a husband like Brian I will never know. He just said, "Okay. Go ahead." I knelt down and snuggled Maddie in my arms and told her she didn't do anything wrong. That Mommy was having a hard time and making bad choices so I needed to go on a walk. I told Ben he didn't do anything wrong either and that I loved them both and walked out. Now what? Tears streaming down my face I stood for a minute, then sat on the front step. Where was I going? I had no idea. Then I saw them. A bunch of kids hauling lumber over the hill and through the forest. Excellent. I was keyed up for a fight and here we go. I just had to follow them to find the stolen chair and I knew it. So I did. I could tell about where they were headed so I circled around the woods beyond their destination and came back right at them. There is a lovely group of post high school kids selling drugs in our neighborhood. Great, right? One guy got out of jail and can't find anyone to take him in so he's been living in the woods. The weather is turning cold so they were starting to build a shelter for him. As I approached I saw it. Right in the middle of their group with a kid sitting in it. A neon yellow tag still hanging off the right arm with my name address and phone number on it. I told them I wanted to know which one of them stole my chair. Of course they said it was theirs, they bought it and to get out of there and leave them alone. I picked up the chair and dumped the kid into the dirt. Showed them the NEON yellow tag with my name and one kid all of a sudden said he didn't know where it came from and it was just there when they came. Idiots. I told them they better not be found stealing anything else from my yard and walked back toward my house. Not twenty steps later I heard them all yelling at each other and fighting. Apparently they all decided that the guy who stole it was in trouble with the clan and wasn't allowed to come down there anymore. I turned around and yelled back how convenient it was that they already knew exactly who stole it. I didn't care who it was. Make sure no one messes with me again. I don't think they will. They were nice to me and my kids all summer. I took the chair back to the house and then walked to a friends house and sat at her kitchen table while she cooked dinner for her family. Turns out her day was just as bad. Only her problems were real. Good to put life into perspective. In the end we got the chair back so Ben doesn't have to buy a new one and I don't have to figure out what to do about the whole situation. I figure he's suffered enough emotionally to qualify as full punishment. I know he won't leave things out again.