Glasses

At Ben's 4 year pediatrician visit, they did a quick eye exam. He didn't want to cooperate at all, so we had to try a few tricks to finally get him to think it was all a big game. I knew right off that he had trouble and the nurse's response verified my thought. He couldn't read more than the top two huge lines. So, I needed an annual eye exam too and I scheduled us to go in together.

Ben was not happy about going to the eye doctor. I told him it was a special mom and Ben date which got him in the car at least. I went first so he would know exactly what to expect when it was his turn. We got to the eye drops and my eyes needed a few minutes to dilate. So we tried to switch places.

Our Mr Ben wouldn't have anything to do with the huge chair. Finally, I had him sit on my lap. Through the course of a long conversation and lots of negotiation we got him to read us the letters on the wall. Right off the doctor told me, "Well, we can tell for sure he has your eyes." I did have to chuckle at that, because I have always loved that Ben and Brian both have amazing brown eyes. Of course, he unfortunately meant that Ben had really poor vision, best case he is 20/50, maybe worse. Rather than traumatize him more by doing eye drops, which almost made Ben have a meltdown, we decided to come back in a week to dilate his eyes and try to get a good view of his eyes and a decent prescription. While I checked out, I had Ben do a treasure hunt around the office to find the kid size glasses. He was totally unwilling to try any on even to play around.

I was so nervous for Ben. I know how much I hated my glasses as a kid and how I felt I had no friends all through elementary school because I was ugly. It truly broke my heart to know what is coming in his life.

We talked endlessly about how brave Ben was going to be at the eye doctor on our next visit. There was nothing that seemed to calm him about the idea of glasses or the eye doctor or anything else. Morning of the second appointment, he was having tantrums anyway, not the way to go to the doctor. When we got to the office, he clammed up completely, rolled in a ball on my lap and held his doll Potsy against his eyes as tightly as he could. There was nothing we could do.

Dr. Kahn quickly decided the best thing to do was to let it go. He would do a prescription as best he could from the numbers he got the last visit. We hope it will be good enough to show him how much help glasses are and come back in a year. Maybe at 5 yrs old he'll be more cooperative.

We went to pick frames and Ben just threw them on the ground. He would have nothing to do with any of them. I was horrified and totally embarrassed. This child was not my child 3 months ago. He is so over the top with everything and a total baby about anything he isn't in the mood for. Some days I just want to strangle him or scream "Grow Up You Little Brat!" I bought the glasses the doctor recommended after he got one pair on him to get a reference point of what was the right size and left totally heartbroken that Ben won't let me help him.